Yet again with the lack of blogging. Ugh. I
really need to be more organised. This semester I’ve had full time uni with
ridiculous subjects like accounting, a casual office job and an internship.
It’s nearly done my head in. I don’t know how people have two or three jobs. They
need a medal. Seriously.
So again I say I’m going to blog and forget
about it/can’t be bothered. I get online and read blogs nearly every day but I
find that actually writing means a whole load of effort for me right now.
There’s not a lot of interesting stuff to blog about either and I’m also
lacking a full length mirror at the moment so I can’t even see my outfits
before I go out, let alone outfit posts. In order to see most of my outfit
before I go out, I must stand on the lid of my toilet and look in the bathroom
medicine cabinet. No glamour around these parts.
Since I last posted I’ve finished my first
semester of uni and got somehow managed to wrangle two distinctions and two
credits overall so I’m super happy with my current GPA of 5.5. I’ve also gone
back home up north to see the fam. It wasn't that exciting and the lack of pics
show it. It did, however, reaffirm why I left. The drama. Ugh. So then I
returned and started my internship two days a week to try and knock some time
off my prac hours.
My brother also decided he’s moving down.
So he’s living with us, which means goodbye clothes room and hello reorganising
EVERYTHING in my room. It also means the rest of my furniture has come down
finally…which includes my new mattress my mum got me. YAY. There are a couple
of downsides to this whole bit. Not only do I lose my large walk in wardrobe, I
also was told by my dad I need to get a part time job because he can’t afford
to support me and my brother. Boo. I was quite enjoying being a lady of
leisure. But as it turns out, the branch down here of my old work could use
someone a couple of days a week for data entry type stuff so here I am.
I think I’ve avoided the blogging front
because I’m also a little bit disappointed with where my life is right now.
Although I am at uni, which I love more than I thought I would, and have enough
money each payday to cover my needs, I'm just not happy. It’s taken me six
months to realise that I’ve been kidding myself and been in denial. I’m lonely.
There it is. The two words women are not meant to utter. Then on top of this,
most of my friends are in relationships and nearly all of those are pregnant.
Argh! There are babies everywhere. The worst case scenario has happened…my
biological clock has finally started ticking and it’s not good. I’ve never been
the most maternal person in my group of friends. Even though my dog really is
like a baby. Finances is another thing to take into account. Since it’s just
been me, I haven’t exactly been careful with my money and I would be humiliated
if I had to show anyone my bills. Even my parents don’t know exactly how much
debt I have. It’ll be staying that way too. Especially the credit cards. Yes, cards.
It’s a vicious cycle. The more unhappy I am, the more I compensate by shopping
and by shopping I use my cards which means I become unhappy. Very vicious
cycle. It’s just never really been high on my list of priorities. Especially
now with uni and then a career. Leads me
to wonder, can you ‘have it all’ as a female or is something always going to
suffer and be put on the back-burner It’s something worth pondering and no
doubt something that will discovered on the way.
First things first though…a man just may
help. But it’s not through a lack of trying, trust me. At the moment I have a
few friends who are amazing girls who are single. How they’re single I’ll never
know. Have males missed a memo about what these girls are like?? Weird. I'm sure it’ll all work out for the best eventually though. All you can do is just
go with it.
Well that’s enough of being a Negative
Nelly for now.
